It was sensationally revealed today that Radio 1 DJ Jo Whiley, is in fact a being from outer space. The revelation came during the changing tracks section of Whiley's very own show, where listeners send in their own heart rending or inspiring personal accounts of how songs such as the "Toy Dolls" cover of "Nellie the Elephant" helped them to beat their drug addiction or recover from the loss of their gay lover.

It was following the story of a woman who had traveled to earth some years ago from the distant world of Bandwagonia and found it hard to be accepted into society until she discovered that the generally frowned upon conventions of arse kissing and bandwagon jumping could be used to fool the populace into thinking that you were cool and down with the kids. Shortly after Babylon Zoo's Spaceman had faded out from the airwaves, the 41 year old could be heard sobbing in the background before coming back to the mic to confess that she was in fact an alien, sent to earth to subdue society be removing our ability to form opinions. She was later taken away by the government and shot.

It is believed that a clone of Whiley is now in place and her show will continue to be broadcast at the usual hours of the morning on BBC Radio 1. I personally was hoping that the Kaiser Chiefs would be drafted back in to fill the gap after their successful stint on Bank Holiday Monday but evidently my flood email to Radio 1 has fallen on deaf ears.